Have you ever heard the phrase, “it takes two to tango”? This phrase is frequently used in couple’s therapy to illustrate the delicate dance between two independent individuals functioning together as a partnership. Often, this dance can be thrown off balance by excessive dependency within the relationship, resulting in controlling behaviors, poor communication, infidelity, and a complete breakdown in intimacy. When overdependency has crept into your relationship, you never feel completely secure and there is an overwhelming fear you will be abandoned by your partner. Here are 7 warning signs you may be excessively relying on your partner to meet your emotional needs and make you happy.
- You give into his or her needs and neglect your own. After a while, you and your partner may end up feeling resentful towards each other.
- You seek your partner’s approval as reassurance and feel empty without some form of validation from your partner. You lack any feeling of self-worth and identity.
- You remain in an unhealthy situation because you are afraid to leave. You tolerate unhealthy behaviors such as addictions, infidelity, or any form of abuse.
- You can’t do things by yourself outside of the relationship such as hobbies and socializing. You have given up cherished interests and friends just to be with your partner and satisfy his or her needs.
- You are overwhelmed with feelings of anxiety when you are not with your partner. You may often be suspicious of their whereabouts and what they are doing. You may constantly feel the urge to call or text just to check in. You might become irritable that he or she is spending too much time with friends or family and not focused on you.
- You dread any disagreement because you feel your partner may disapprove of you. This can lead to the feeling of “walking on eggshells”. You can’t compromise fairly if you feel less than your partner.
- You play the role of a caregiver or rescuer or feel the need to solve your partner’s problems.
I have helped many individuals and couples understand the underlying causes of dependency and provide useful tools which can eliminate these unhealthy patterns within their intimate relationships. I can help you return to a balanced dance with your partner.